When I first spoke of my wife's pregnancy on this site, there were some people who were exited to hear some "dooce-esque" posts from yours truly. I have to admit that there was a certain draw to this idea.

I love Heather's ability to bring you into the everyday life of her family; to share the triumphs and travails that make life worth living. I especially love the Monthly newsletters to her daughter. I quickly found that I didn't have the time or desire to create that type of content, as fun and touching as it seemed.

I think, finally I have something that I want to talk about. So here goes Daddy Blog 1.0.

As I have found my way through the wilderness of fatherhood I have learned many important lessons. Real love is unconditional, and a fount that has no bottom; That the smallest things done by your child become more precious than gold, jewels or listings on CSS Showcase sites.

Perhaps most importantly, that the scream of pain from your child strips you of every delusion of strength and fortitude that you wear to protect yourself like armor. This week I had one of those moments, and it will be something that I will not soon forget.

The calling and curse of the parent

To be a parent is to be ready to lay down your life for your child. To defend and protect them from harm, both physical and emotional, and from the snares of our all too dangerous world. One night this week, I was confronted with the reality that sometimes you cannot protect them from the pain, or take it away. My son has unfortunately inherited my constitution, which has its good points and its bad. One of those bad points is that certain foods wreak havoc on our digestive systems.

Jakob had fish for the first time this week, and it looks like we found one of the havoc wreaking foods for him. At 2:00 the next morning he woke up in serious travail, wailing in pain for what seemed like a lifetime. All that my wife and I could do was to give him some medication and hold him while things took their course.

Every one of his cries broke my heart into pieces, each one jagged edged and raw. When the medicine finally had time to take hold and he was able to fall back to sleep again, all I could do was lay in bed and weep.

I have learned many lessons so far in my role as father, but this was by far the hardest.

When I woke up the next morning I was greeted by Jakob smiling and laughing; things were right with the world again and I found in his simple, pure joy the strength to rise from my bed and be daddy again.